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September 24, 2013 by Sharla Jacobs and Jesse Koren

3 Secrets to Dancing with Concerns

Imagine you’re having a conversation with a potential client and just as you think they’re going to say, “Yes,” they say, “I can’t afford it,” or “I just don’t have the time for this.”

Concerns are a natural part of any Heartselling Conversation…
However, if you aren’t able to dance with concerns masterfully, you’ll hear more “No’s” than “Yes’s.” And wouldn’t you rather hear more “Yes’s”?!

We want you to be able to attract clients anywhere, anytime. So here are 3 powerful secrets that will help you dance with concerns with more confidence and skill (and feel in alignment with your own integrity).

Secret #1: Dancing with Concerns is a Spiritual Practice

When you’re dancing with concerns, you are talking to yourself. How you dance with your clients’ concerns is the way you dance with your own concerns.

Are you dancing with your own concerns with judgment or compassion? With assumptions? Or with curiosity? We recommend compassion and curiosity… it feels better and gets you further in the conversation.

Secret #2: Honoring Your Highest Commitment is Essential

Sharla4When you’re dancing with concerns, your job is to help your potential clients discover their Highest Commitment. Once they discover their Highest Commitment, then your job is to do everything in your power to help them say Yes to that.

If you’re not saying Yes to your own Highest Commitment, then it’s going to be impossible to hold them to their Highest Commitment. You can ask the right questions, but you’ll be asking from a pushy place. Because whatever is holding you back from saying Yes to your Highest Commitment will hold you back from taking a stand for them to say Yes.


Ask yourself the following questions:

1. “What is MY Highest Commitment?”
2. “What do I need to start saying Yes to, in order to hold myself to my Highest Commitment?”

Answering these questions, and then taking action on what is a YES for you, will help you support your potential clients in their Yes.

Secret #3: Saying Yes when you mean Yes (and No when you mean No) Sparks Action

We encourage you to become really good at saying Yes and No, and not belaboring decisions for months or years. Decisions that you put off become like cobwebs in the corner. They become like piles on your desk. They just clutter up your clarity.

When you’re saying maybe, or “I need to think about it,” you delay action. And you delay the Universe in delivering the support you need. However, a clear Yes or No sparks action and can set you in motion towards your Highest Commitment.

Are there decisions in your life that are piling up? If so, we encourage you to take action on them in the next 24 hours. Be clear with your Yes and your No and see how much energy this frees up for you (and your Heartselling Conversations!).

When you recognize that dancing with concerns is a spiritual practice, and put these secrets into action in your own life, you will begin to see an immediate impact on your Heartselling Conversations. And we’d love to hear what you discover! Tell us about it here:

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