August 19, 2015 by Sharla Jacobs

“If You’re A Healer, You’re Not Supposed To Sell”: A Case Study with Tomasa Macapinlac

Are you a healer who believes you’re not supposed to sell?

Maybe you’ve been working at it for a while and you feel like you’ve hit a ceiling or a block around how big you can grow, how many clients you can get, or how much money you can earn.

Sometimes we are just too close to our own story and can’t see the path that leads to the next level for ourselves.

That’s why I love hearing the story of someone else’s journey and the specific steps they took to break free of their gremlins and evolve in their own business.

Today’s blog post is an excerpt from my interview with $10,000-Month Club Member, Tomasa Macapinlac. Tomasa came to the Client Attraction Summit way back in 2008 (when it was called Rejuvenate Your Practice) as a practitioner of Acupressure and Jin Shin Jyustu. She joined Thrive Academy Platinum and put what she learned into action quickly.

In the interview, Tomasa shares valuable insights about a serious mindset shift about what it means to be a healer and some simple steps she took to break through her money ceiling very quickly.

***************************************************

Sharla: Let’s start from the beginning.Where were you [in your business] when you came to the Summit?

Tomasa: By the time I came to you guys it was 11 years since I’d been in business as a healing arts practitioner. And I was still working part time hours and I couldn’t get past about $3,000 a month. I remember getting to about $1,600 a month and then I got to $3,000 a month.

And I’d been in the high tech world making a lot more money than that! It was like, “Tomasa, if this is the work that you love, then you need to take this to the level that you are capable of. You’re not there and you know what? It’s time to do it now.”

Sharla: So I’m curious, what had you tried before? You couldn’t get past the $3,000 a month mark. And you had previous sales experience. So you would think that with experience in sales you should be fine doing your own business, but it wasn’t like that.

Tomasa: Here’s the thing. I was not sitting in community. To get to that $3,000 a month in sales, it was more like going out and putting my flyers up wherever. There was an Elephant Pharmacy near me at the time which hosted holistic classes. And I would go and teach classes there and NOT make offers.

And I could feel people wanting to work with me more but I didn’t know how to make an offer without feeling like, “Oh God, these people came to get information” and not feeling so salesy about it.

I began to realize after I started working with you [and Jesse] that I was doing a disservice to those people. Because here they were salivating for more of my work and I wasn’t giving it to them. I would just give them whatever I had prepared for them, that one-hour class and I wouldn’t make an offer at the end. I was doing them a disservice and I was wasting my time.

Sharla: So you would teach classes and not get any clients from it. I’m curious, what was your mindset?

Tomasa: I [used to] think that when you’re a healer, you’re not supposed to sell. We’re not supposed to make offers. People are supposed to magically appear to us. Instead of us getting out there and sharing our gifts.

My mindset was, “This is the life of a healer. This is the way it’s supposed to be.”

Sharla: So it was like, “This is just the way it is” and there were no other possibilities.

Tomasa: Right.

Sharla: Wow! So what was the first big shift that you had that caused you to have a big income jump?

Tomasa: The first big shift for me was actually after the [Client Attraction Summit]... I was on a sliding scale with my clients. So they could pay me anywhere from $60-90 for a session. That was the first thing I did. I took away the sliding scale and I gave myself a raise. I think I said, “Anyone who comes to see me, they now pay $90 for a session.”

That was the first big thing that I did for myself. Anyone who was on the lower end of the scale they either went away or they paid the $90 per session.

And then probably the second thing I did was, I wasn’t taking credit cards. I was only doing cash or checks. So I opened up a merchant account and started taking credit cards. I was already offering packages by the way. But my packages took another leap. They went on the higher end.

And I remember, I put them on paper. Oh, that was a big thing! [laughs]…

I noticed that when I wrote it up, people could see what they were saving but I also got more people to sign up for packages. Those who were not in packages, they [moved from one session at a time to a package].

So I began to have more of a loyal following with less sales. I didn’t have to sell as much. People would buy their packages of six. And then I wouldn’t have to keep selling them every time they came to see me. When six sessions were over, usually within 90 days, then they would just buy another package of six.

Sharla: I’m curious, your business has evolved. In the beginning it was just changing over to packages that made a difference. When you and I did a VIP Day together, I remember we really looked at how you were charging x dollars per package and this percentage of people you talk to say yes, and this percentage of people keep signing up for more. And we actually drilled down to exactly how many people you needed to talk to every month in order to have the practice of the size you wanted.

Tomasa: I know that I ended up having about 50 sessions a month and I started tracking all of my numbers after my VIP Day with you.

Sharla: Just the act of tracking your numbers is so valuable.

Tomasa: It is. Because you can get an overview of what your business looks like. How many conversations was I having? How many people would get offered the package? How many would say yes or no? How many were loyal clients? ...about 60-70% [of the people I talked with said Yes].

Sharla: I think that’s a really powerful exercise. Just to write down those numbers of how many people you’re talking with. It was really easy to get clear on how many clients you want and how many people you then need to talk to in order to have that happen.

Tomasa: Yes!

************************************************

By implementing just a few things Tomasa learned at Thrive Academy, she has a rockin’ business!

To recap the tips Tomasa shared in her story:

Raise your rates by eliminating the sliding scale.
Make offers when you’ve got an audience. It’s a disservice not to.
Take credit cards to make it easier for clients to pay. (Easier now than years ago…
If you’re not already set up, it’s easy at www.SquareUp.com)
Offer packages so you don’t have to sell over and over again. For more on how to create packages, check out this blog post.
Show your potential clients your package rates on paper so they see how much they will save.
Figure out how many new clients you need each month to earn the income you desire...and then track it.

Years after joining Thrive Academy Platinum, Tomasa continues to consistently enjoy $10,000+ months in her business as “Your Holistic Business Mentor.” She also is the host of the Holistic Chamber of Commerce in San Ramon, CA. You can learn more about Tomasa at http://tomasamacapinlac.com/

Let us know your thoughts in the comment box below.

August 12, 2015 by Sharla Jacobs

How to Raise Your Rates (And Feel Good About It)

Have you ever wanted to raise your rates, but the voices of fear keep you from actually doing it?

These internal voices say things like:

Who are you to think you can charge more?
Is it even spiritual to accept money at all?
If you were really spiritual you would do this work for free!
No one will sign up because they won’t be able to afford it. People will think you’re greedy or in it just for the money.
Other _____________ (coaches, practitioners, massage therapists, nutrition counselors, etc.) charge ________. How can you even consider charging more?

How do we know about these voices?

Many years ago, we raised our hourly coaching rate (to a rate that sounds like a smokin’ deal now, LOL)…

I (Sharla) stood on stage in front of some of our best clients, offering VIP days (which we rarely offer because our time is so limited for private clients). And although I looked confident on the outside, I was trembling inside.

I KNEW that working with Jesse and me privately would help these clients position themselves like rock stars, attract the exact right clients, create a clear path to get from where they were stuck in their business to exactly how much income they wanted to make…while working less.

But suddenly I had the same feelings of insecurity and discomfort that I experienced the first time I raised my fees…and the second and the third.

No matter how many times you raise your fees, it’s common to “not feel ready” or to know you’re ready but still feel uncomfortable, especially when you start actually telling your potential clients about it.

But there comes a time when what you’re charging doesn’t feel balanced with the value you’re providing and you’ve got to do it in order to stay in integrity with yourself and in alignment with your values.

Here are 3 Tips to help you raise your rates:

Tip #1: Avoid looking to other coaches and holistic practitioners to figure out what you should charge.

Many of our members initially say, “Other [therapists, coaches, etc.] charge this much; so how can I charge more?”

Instead, look for how you can INCREASE the value you offer to your clients rather than be just like everyone else in your industry.

When I was pregnant with our first son, Jacob (now 7), my belly got too big to lie face down on the massage table and I noticed I was having a difficult time enjoying a satisfying massage. So, I sought out a therapist with an ergonomically designed cushion for expecting moms like me and was happy to pay the extra dollars for the added value.

Ask yourself, “How can I increase the value of what I’m offering? What do I offer that’s unique?”

Tip #2: “Feel Into” Your New Rate

If you’re charging too little, you’ll likely feel resentful and overworked. If you’re charging too much, you might feel greedy. There is a perfect balance that lies somewhere in between.

Unless you feel like you can truly own your new rates, you’ll stumble and feel awkward when sharing these new rates with potential clients.

To figure out what rate you can confidently own, here’s a short exercise:

Imagine you’re talking with a potential client.
And say the price you want out loud.
Then check in with your body to find out how it feels.

If it feels GREAT, you just might have your new price.

If it feels anything other than GREAT, you’re not there yet.

If you don’t feel anything in your body, don’t worry.

Sometimes the new rate just doesn’t have much juice.

Also, not everyone gets information from checking in with how their body feels. Some people just have a voice of clarity or inner knowing that it’s right or not right. Others need to imagine publishing this new rate on your website (although we don’t recommend this for reasons we can share in the future).

Just use the best way of discovering what’s right for you when you’re making a decision.

Still confused about it?

At the Client Attraction Summit, we will guide you through an exercise to find your perfect fees. Chances are you’ll give yourself a raise because at least 95% of our past participants have done so.

Tip #3: Be Willing to Feel Uncomfortable for a Short Time After You Raise Your Rates

I have always found that whenever I have raised my private coaching rates, I go through an “adjustment” period.

At first, it’s difficult to say (like in the story I shared earlier in the article). Then I justify this increase to myself by thinking about how my clients will get more value at this new rate and how I deserve to be paid well for the great work I do. Eventually, I settle into it as perfect and right.

What usually happens after I get the first big “Yes!” is I’m able to “own” my new fee and it fits perfectly. I have found that this is when the real shift happens.

After having a difficult time at that event sharing our new VIP day rates for the first time (with not one single client saying “Yes” by the way), I could have decided that I’d made a huge mistake and I should drop my rates back down.

Instead, I knew that going through the discomfort of the “adjustment period” was part of my process and if I hung in there long enough, I would eventually feel comfortable and confident.

A few weeks later we got our first client at our new rate. I felt a little nervous just before the initial consultation call, but I showed up with 100% of my energy, now fully aligned with the new fee. And because I owned my value, our client got tons more out of it than if we were charging our lower fee.

We haven’t raised our rates for private coaching for years because we feel so aligned with our rates for private work. (It’s all about alignment.)

When you feel great about your rates, you don’t question them….

But when something is niggling at you that it’s time to raise them, it’s common to experience this adjustment period and then eventual success.

If you’re willing to deal with the discomfort for a short time, knowing that it is part of the process of raising your fees (and not a sign you should shrink back), then you’re on the road to attracting more appreciative clients who will see the value in what you have to offer.

And the good news is:

Over time, you’ll become less intimidated by the prospect of raising your rates. You’ll just know when the time is right and become aligned with it more quickly. The adjustment period shrinks and you’re on your way to serving your clients in a deeper way, because you’re aligned with what your clients are investing to transform their lives by working with you.

Let us know your thoughts in the comment box below.

July 28, 2015 by Jesse Koren

When to put your business on hold?

One of our Thrive Community members has a best friend who is dying and she posted about her grief in our private Thrive Membership Facebook group. It was a beautiful, heartfelt post that touched me (Jesse) deeply.

Her therapist recommended that she take a break from her business and allow herself to fully grieve. From my perspective, this is not a bad idea. But it’s also not necessarily a good idea.

I wrote a response to her post in the Membership and I decided to share some of my response with you, to support you when your life circumstances are so challenging that you’re tempted to take a break from your business.

If your life is very tough now, this will be especially relevant. And, if your life is awesome, this might be a blog post you forward to a coach or holistic practitioner friend who is going through a tough time.

Here’s what I wrote:

----------------------

Thank you for sharing this. What an intense, incredible journey. I appreciate everything you shared and everything you asked for. You are amazing.

I know how deep the grieving can go and I believe that only you can decide whether or not to take a break from your business and for how long.

I’ve found that sometimes taking a break from your business is the perfect thing to do.

When I first started my business and had no business training whatsoever, I couldn’t get one paying client to save my life. Out of frustration and compassion for my failure, I took a year away from my “business” to reset and heal before ramping back up and succeeding the second time.

When both my boys were born, I chose to take about 3 weeks off so that I could support Sharla and set an incredible foundation with my new family. I’m SO glad I did this.

There have been other times where life circumstances have been VERY challenging and VERY emotional. Everything inside of me wanted to quit my business and walk away from everything I had built. But, I knew that this was not my truth… just me trying to avoid the discomfort of being called to stretch and grow in new ways. So, I’ve stayed the course for ten years.

The only one who can make the decision to take time away from your business or not, is… you.

I find that self-care and healing is often best done in small chunks of time and that we can get lost in a sea of depression if we give ourselves an indefinite amount of months to heal from tough life circumstances.

If I was grieving the death of someone close to me, I imagine that I would take a week or two or three away from our business to fully nurture myself and my family.

And, then, if I was still going through it, I would do everything in my power to get the nurturing, support, love, and healing for a couple of hours everyday.

Then, I would dedicate the rest of my day to channeling my emotion into service for you and every other Thriver, and my team and my boys and Sharla.

What I’m sharing is not “the right thing to do”. But it is my truth in this moment, as someone who is committed to taking my experience and dedicating it to the people who have asked for my support. The people who would miss my presence if I stepped away from Thrive for a long time.

There are people who are waiting for you also, who will benefit from your wisdom, heart and experience. And who would miss you, if you stepped away for too long.

I don’t believe that life is giving you anything you can’t handle. As they say, “whatever doesn’t kill you will make a great seminar story.” When you dedicate your life to service, everything you go through is in service to you being the best leader you can be, for your people. So, if you’re going through a tough time, trust that you’ll get through it soon, and everyone will benefit from your healing and empowerment, including you.

So, to sum this all up, I invite you to make a conscious decision as to whether you want to take time away from your business, and if so, how long. And, if you choose to take time off from your business, I invite you to hold a vision for who you will be, when you re-emerge.

I look forward to hearing what you decide. 🙂

----------------------

I hope that, wherever you are right now in your business and whatever you are experiencing in this moment in life, you have the courage to treat yourself with kindness and compassion.

Sometimes being kind to yourself means backing off and sometimes being kind means stepping up. I encourage you to get the support you need to do whichever is right for you.

And if you know someone who is going through a tough time right now, I hope you will share this article with them...

Let us know your thoughts in the comment box below.

July 21, 2015 by Jesse Koren

3 Secrets for Moving Forward Even When You Don’t Feel Ready...

Do you ever feel like you’re just not ready?

To get your first client. To lead your first workshop. To write your book or Home Study Course. To fill a High End Group Program. To have your first $10,000 month...

If you don’t feel ready, you’re not alone. Whenever you are considering growing to the next level, it’s so easy to feel like you’re not ready.

Because if you were ready, wouldn’t you already be where you wanted to be?

Over the last 13 years Sharla and I (Jesse) have often struggled with feelings of “I’m not ready” or “I’m not prepared.”

Fortunately we didn’t let that feeling stop us from reaching our people. Along the way we’ve discovered some strategies that have helped us when we didn’t feel ready.

Strategies that have allowed us to continue to up our game and help over 50,000 people worldwide.

After working with thousands of gifted Coaches and Holistic Practitioners, we’ve discovered that two things are almost universally true:

You want to help more people and make more money.
Even though you want this badly, you don’t feel totally, 100% ready.

Everyone has ways of coping with their feelings of not being ready. But some strategies work better than others.

Here are some strategies that don’t work so well:

Raiding the refrigerator (substitute your addiction of choice)
Zoning out in front of your computer or tv
Getting a ton of certifications to prove that you are ready. (Sometimes, our clients with the highest credentials have felt the least ready.)

What can you do instead? Here are my 3 secrets for moving forward even when you don’t feel ready...

Secret #1: Commit Now (and trust you’ll be ready when the time comes)

We are about to set our schedule for our 2016 events. Am I ready for next year’s events? Hell, no. But, I do know that once I commit to the dates, the Universe then goes to work to prepare me for each event. I will get the magical blend of support and challenge that will help me be of the greatest service to the people who attend each event.

Let’s take this premise a step further. Recently, the night before a big Client Attraction Summit, one of our team members asked me if I was ready for the event. “No, I’m not ready,” I said. She looked a little concerned. “But I will be ready tomorrow morning at 9am.” As soon as I said that, I felt a rush of excitement shoot through me, as I mentally prepared to greet a couple hundred people from all over the US (and some from other countries) who were coming to take their life and business to the next level.

And ready I was.

This has happened enough times that I have come to realize that if I commit to something, I will be ready by the time it happens.

So, expect to NOT be ready at the time you commit... but expect to be ready by the time you get there. And, if what you’re committed to feels like a BIG leap, get ready for a powerful, growth-filled ride that will perfectly prepare you for what you’re leaping into.

Secret #2: Use breath and mantras to get ready

About 7 years ago, I was asked to be a guest speaker at a very large seminar, by far the largest group of people I had ever spoken in front of. I did not feel ready. No matter how much I practiced what I was going to say, I still didn’t feel ready. But, I had to show up and trust that I would be ready by the time I walked on stage, right?

The problem was that I wasn’t speaking until right before lunch, so I had to sit in the audience and wait for my turn to speak. Sweat is pouring out of every pore in my body and all I can think is: “I’m not ready for this. What if this time I really f*#% it up?”

So, I started saying to myself: “I love you no matter how this goes. I love you no matter how this goes. I love you no matter how this goes.” As my time for speaking approached, I was starting to feel a bit safer and a bit calmer.

But then, I discovered that my speaking slot had been moved until after lunch. My gremlins came back even louder than before. “You are definitely going to f&*% this up!”

So, I started another mantra: “Thy Will be Done.” I love this mantra, because it reminds me that there is an Intelligence in this Universe that goes WAY beyond my intelligence and the way I think things should go. After all, my heart beats, my breath goes in and out, flowers bloom, forests grow, and the Earth orbits around the sun... all, without my managing any of it.

By repeating the mantra “Thy Will Be Done,” I handed over control of how the event went to this benevolent intelligence.

Obviously, this Benevolent Intelligence wanted me to stew in my thoughts some more, because my speaking slot got moved AGAIN. So, I started another mantra. And another.

By the time, I finally spoke at about 5:30 in the evening, I had worked through my biggest fears. Without my fears sabotaging me, I delivered an incredible 20-minute talk and was mobbed by people afterward who wanted to get into the Client Attraction Summit. So that happened.

Secret #3: Find Someone Who Believes in You (and let them support you)

There was a time when I really didn’t believe in myself. I was 23. I had flown out to North Carolina to interview for a Wilderness Therapy Counselor position for at risk teens. The interview was a 24-hour interview, where I joined a group of 10 teenagers and their two counselors to experience life at camp. I envisioned a bunch of teens happily working together in the woods and sharing meals together.

Instead, it was the longest 24 hours of my life.

At 10pm, the group was still yelling swear words that echoed across the forest. So, the group counselors took the boys on a walk through the dark woods to settle them down. At 11pm, the boys were still hooting and hollering and saying some of the most disrespectful things I had ever heard. Eventually, Patrick physically restrained one of the boys who was out of control, and held him on the ground until he calmed down. Eventually the group calmed down enough to walk back to their tents and go to sleep.

As I lay awake that night, I knew I wasn’t ready for anything this. I was totally out of my league.

The next morning, I met with the Camp Director, Rhonda, for my final interview. “Everyone loves you here,” she said. I’d like to offer you the position.”

I was stunned. Exhausted. Constipated. And I felt like a deer in the headlights.

“Do you really think I can do this?” I asked.

“Yes, I do,” she said. “And we’re here to support you.”

I looked in her eyes and I knew that she meant it.

I knew that if I said “Yes” it was going to be really, really hard. And I knew that if I said “no” I would be selling out on the leader I so badly wanted to grow into.

I said “yes.”

Over those two years, I doubted myself a ton. There were days when swerving into oncoming traffic seemed easier than showing up for work. But, when it got really rough, I often thought about that day, sitting in Rhonda’s office where she told me that she believed in me. And I leaned into her support and the support of my co-counselors.

When I finally “graduated”, after the 2 years, I had an unshakable confidence in myself. I knew that if I could survive 2 years at that camp, that I could do anything.

This confidence has fueled our success at Thrive. Because I know that there is nothing that Sharla and I can’t fulfill on in our business and with the help of our team. And, I also know that you too, can do anything.

It takes having a community of people supporting you and believing in you, to have the success you want.

Hopefully, you have a LOT of people who believe in you, who are supporting your business and who are rooting for your success.

And, this is one of the biggest gifts we offer at our Client Attraction Summit. Our belief that you can have a successful business where you get paid well to support clients you love.

And, we would love to give you 3 Full Days of our undivided attention and support, to help you get there. This is why we occasionally open Full Scholarships to the Client Attraction Summit.

If you haven’t applied for yours, we invite you to do so now.

Click here to apply for Your Full Scholarship.

We’d love to support you.

Love and Prosperity,

Jesse

Let us know your thoughts in the comment box below.

July 9, 2015 by Sharla Jacobs

How to Deal with the Emotional Trauma from a Business Failure

Have you ever had a big failure in your business?

Maybe you felt embarrassed, scared, unsure of yourself...and it felt so bad you wanted to just crawl under a rock and never come out again?

While Jesse and I had our share of big business failures in the early years, I want to share a story of a big fall with our 4-year old son, Zachary, my mommy trauma and how this relates to your business.

I posted this in Facebook on the 4th of July:

Recovering from Mommy Trauma tonight...

We went to the Scotts Valley 4th of July parade and then the boys and I decided to skate to Sky Park, rather than drive, for the party and fireworks.

Zachary (4) and I take off and we're having a great time. Jesse is on foot and stayed behind with Jacob (7 today) while he skated along.

We turn left onto Blue Bonnet Road and the sidewalk gets a little steep.

Zach and I are holding hands and we pick up speed quickly, but we are able to pretty easily veer off into the dirt right next to the sidewalk.

Jesse sees this and says something about it seeming a little dangerous, but I feel confident--I know we need to be cautious, but know we can just veer off into the dirt whenever needed.

(You have to understand that I'm a really awesome roller skater at the roller rink. And Zach has become quite an awesome inline skater.)

We're holding hands and start skating slowly down the hill again. I'm doing all that I can to maintain a slower speed…

And then the sidewalk suddenly gets REALLY steep...

And then steeper. And now we're racing downhill and there is only the curb on the left and a curb on the right that separates the sidewalk and the landscaping.

We start picking up major speed. Zach cries, "Mommy, I'm scared!"

My heart is racing...but I think we can get through this if we can just keep our skates forward and stay calm until the sidewalk levels out.

Now we are picking up more speed. I keep looking for when the sidewalk will flatten out...or there will be a wide driveway we can turn into.

But at least we are both still heading forward...I feel scared that we're going to have a big crash, but keep doing everything I can to stay present, keep going forward and keep us safe…

Still racing downhill...

Now I've lost control, and I can't figure out what to do to slow us down.

If I use my stoppers, we will go flying forward. If we run into the curb, we are going to eat it big time…

Now I'm scared!

Then Zach loses his balance and suddenly I'm holding him up off the ground with my right hand while we continue to fly downhill.

His skate catches my skate and I trip.

I almost regain control but then he falls into a driveway.

I feel strong momentum as I fall, so I let go of his hand to keep from dragging him on the ground.

I finally catch myself with my right hand, do a half-roll and land on my butt. Then my head hits the ground, the skirt of my dress flies up over my chest and my hat and sunglasses go flying.

I quickly push my skirt back down, get up and skate over to Zach, who is 10 feet away.

He is sitting on his butt with skinned and bloody knees showing through his torn blue baseball socks, that he (thank God) had pulled up over his knees.

"My flag, Mommy!" He is worried about his little American flag he got during the parade.

I grab the flag quickly while people across the street start walking over.

"Are you okay?"

"I think so."

"We saw you hit your head."

"I think I'm okay." I was just worried about my babe.

The flag seems to soothe him.

I remain calm and try to distract him from seeing his bloody knees. We get up to skate slowly (the hill isn't as steep here and that damn curb between the sidewalk and landscaping is finally gone).

From the top of the hill to the fall was a very long 20 seconds…

(You know that moment after the emergency is over and you realize something big just happened?)

We skate another 10 feet and I see a shady walkway to the right. "Let's sit down here and wait for Daddy and Jacob."

We sit on the ground and he sees his bloody knees. He starts crying while he pulls apart one of the rips in his sock.

"I'll buy you a new pair of socks. I'm so sorry, baby. We were going too fast and I didn't know how to slow us down."

We talk about how it hurts while he cries.

Daddy and Jacob arrive and I share briefly about what happened. The car isn't far and I know we've got Arnica, Bacitracin and Band-aids in the glove box.

I suggest Jesse carry Zach to the car.

Fortunately, Band-aids cover up bloody knees. And when you can't see them, they don't hurt as bad.

"I'm so sorry, Zachary!" He gives me a hug and then goes back to Daddy's lap.

We finally end up at the park and Zach says he wants to go home...But it's Jacob's birthday. And I know we can move on and he'll feel better.

"Zachary, I'm so sorry we were going so fast. And I'm so sorry you were so scared and got hurt. Mommy made a big mistake. We will never go down that hill in skates ever again.

Will you forgive me?"

He nods his head yes.

Shortly after eating dinner, I invite Zach to play some games. He says yes and seems to have mostly forgotten about his knees.

The park and the fireworks were great…

Until we were driving home, stuck in post-fireworks traffic on the same street where we fell.

The kids are fine, almost asleep. But my heart starts racing again as I see the sidewalk we raced down. I'm having trouble breathing.

Jesse notices and after a short conversation about what I'm experiencing, he suggests I do some EFT when we get home.

I don't usually do EFT, but the anxiety is really intense. I keep hoping tears will come and release it as we drive home, but they don't. I try shaking and this doesn't help either.

I keep thinking about what I could have done differently. If I had asked Zach to use his stopper, since it's on the back, that might have slowed us down. That's the only thing I could think of.

With my hand on my heart, I quietly tell myself I did the best I could in the moment as we drive home.

We get home and after the kids are asleep, I ask Jesse to teach me how to do EFT again.

After about 20 minutes of talking, tapping and eventually forgiving myself, I feel that I've moved the emotional trauma out of my body.

I realize now that the hardest part was not the fall...that was actually a relief within two seconds of realizing we were okay.

The hardest part was the fear I felt as we were racing downhill at what must have been 20 mph. The lack of control in my body. The danger my little guy was in and the feeling of powerlessness because I couldn't figure out what to do.

I realize my overconfidence worked against me today and put my babe in danger. I feel SO incredibly grateful that we got out with only two skinned knees, a road rash on my hand and a little bump on my head.

No broken bones. No concussion. No stitches.

I'm grateful I have such an amazing and loving husband.
I'm grateful our angels took care of us.
And I'm grateful for the healing and empowerment work that is so readily available.

Writing this story was really therapeutic for me. And then to be witnessed by posting on Facebook and reading the 70+ comments filled with love and support was awesome.

Zachary wasn’t quite ready to get back in his rollerblades the next day. But two days later, he is back in them as if nothing happened!

When Jesse and I looked back at this story, we realized there were several insights into how to deal with emotional trauma from a business failure.

1. Be willing to take risks. While it’s true that my overconfidence got us into trouble, the willingness to take risks is essential to having a successful business.

You don’t always know what you’re getting yourself into and it will sometimes be scary. But when you’re not willing to take risks, you can’t learn and grow.

Zachary and I were just talking about pushing our limits minutes before we turned onto Blue Bonnet Road. Will you sometimes get bloody knees in your business? Yes.

But if your fear of bloody knees keeps you from taking risks, your business will stay limited to where it is now.

2. Ask for support. I’m so grateful I had the wherewithal to realize we needed support and to sit and wait for Jesse to come help us after the accident.

After you fall down, it’s essential to get support. We love witnessing our Thrive Members asking for support in the Thrive Membership Facebook Group because we know that without being supported and loved after a “failure,” it’s much harder to get up again. Human beings are NOT meant to deal with struggle and hardship alone. We need support.

3. Be resilient. My biggest concern was that Zachary wouldn’t want to get back up on his rollerblades again.

Fortunately, children are very resilient and he only needed a day to move through his trepidation.

How can you bounce back just as quickly?

Create a safe environment where you can experiment with new strategies.

If you’re new to strategies like using the free consultation formula, creating your first group program, getting speaking gigs or making offers at a workshop or live event, for example, it will be much easier to bounce back when you’ve got a safe environment.

At the Client Attraction Summit, we call this being “Sexy.”

We tell participants on Day 1 that it’s not going to be a perfect weekend. It’s going to be a Sexy weekend. So instead of saying “I’m so stupid!” when you mess something up you say, “I’m so Sexy!”

Just like Zachary, your willingness to get back up again and have fun is the only way you’ll be successful in the long run.

4. Use tools to deal with any upset. I was so grateful to have EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) when I realized I still had emotional trauma after the fall.

When you have a failure, it’s essential you fully deal with what happened and allow yourself to recover. Otherwise, you’ll take that failure into the next thing and you can get frozen with fear.

Give yourself permission to take care of yourself, to ask for support, to realize that you’re human and that it is your humanity that will ultimately draw the deepest connection between you and your community. This is how you’ll bounce back quickly from emotional traumas in your business.

Did you enjoy this post? Please leave a comment and share it with others who might enjoy it too.

Let us know your thoughts in the comment box below.